two sides of the coin

Earlier this week I had drinks with a friend. Her and her partner and currently in the midst of the IVF process, and her partner carried their twins last time. Two women, whose families are both trying to get pregnant - but on very opposite sides of the 'getting pregnant' card. I've done it already, she has only experienced parenthood from the other side thus far-

It was an interesting conversation, i think therapeutic on many levels for us both. Giving us a chance to ask those questions that seem to be taboo to most:
- Do you fear loving a child more or less that came from your own body?

- Fear being able to be as successful being pregnant as your partner previously (twins vs. a singleton pregnancy - may seem irrelevant to some, I guess not as much when you are in the situation)

- feelings about being birth mom vs. non-birth mom - who get's to make decisions, how do you bond?

In all - a good conversation and really opened my eyes, or at least reminded me that there are two sides to every coin. For as sad as I am on some level about not carrying a baby this time around, I want to be excited for my partner. I want her to have the same support, the same experience that I did.

To add insult - I am ovulating right now myself. Maybe this makes it all the more fresh - but why am I so aware of my body now that I am not trying to get pregnant? Sheesh.